Relentless competition, constant conflict, perpetual stress. The dog-eat-dog corporate world has a knack for putting intelligent, capable, empathetic people through the grinder and churning out jaded, self-centered individuals. That is what makes networking so tricky. Bluntly put, it is a transaction for professional benefit rather than a genuine connection.
It does not have to be that way. We each have the ability to connect with others based on genuine mutual interest. By applying that laudable quality to our networking efforts, we can create resilient professional relationships. These bonds are less likely to fray or diminish over time.
Where to Begin
Research shows that our longest and most meaningful relationships are those that begin early in life. Therefore, viewed through the friend versus network lens, the strongest professional relationships would be those formed with people with whom we are friends already.
Naturally, our individual life paths often diverge from those of our friends. However, that is not necessarily a hurdle to networking and can, in fact, be an advantage. Cross-industry professional networks show everyone involved a broader scope of possibilities and inspire innovation. An approach or solution that has reached saturation levels in your field is less likely to have been implemented elsewhere and vice versa.
Good friendships are also a good insulator against headwinds. With a solid bond to draw upon, professionals from diverse professions are more likely to persist against blowback transform their ideas into reality.
The “Where” Matters
Golfing is arguably the activity most closely associated with networking. The first reason is that golf club memberships are inherently exclusive and, thus, desirable. Second, golfing offers long static periods between bursts of activity—the ideal scenario for bonding. Last but not least, anyone who is anyone is doing it.
Those three reasons make golfing a great professional choice but a rather poor one for friendships. It is the same with “networking events.” They, too, are “tainted” with the aura of self-serving desires rather than genuine friendship.
Choose an activity that you enjoy and work at being good at it. You will inevitably meet people who share a passion for that sport or pastime which may also be able to help you professionally. However, without the three traits that make golfing such a distinctly career-oriented choice, these relationships are more likely to be based on a genuine mutual bond.
Keep it Friendly
We can never predict where or when we will develop deeper feelings for a colleague or friend. However, it is always a good idea not to let a personal romantic relationship overlap with your professional one.
A platonic work bond resists a myriad of possible pitfalls. Not the least of these is how the toxicity of a failed relationship can contaminate an otherwise flourishing association. So resist the temptation to transform either one to the other.
