The act of asking for help itself can feel like an ordeal. Many get a sense of foreboding about exposing their shortcomings and revealing weaknesses. Others may loathe the thought of subsequently being obliged to reciprocate.

Asking for a hand does not have to be the bed of coals these scenarios make it seem like. Here are five ways to understand how to request assistance.

Extend a Hand

Few of us appreciate the dynamic between help giver and requester until we are placed in the position of the latter. While we readily offer our time, expertise, and connections to others when they ask, the equation seems so much more lopsided when the positions are reversed.

You can offset that imbalance by investing in a vast repository of goodwill and karma. Offer your help freely and with no expectation of a quid pro quo. If ever a time arrives where you are in need, the people whom you have helped before will be eager to reciprocate.

Be Specific

Most people who want to help want also to be able to give you a direct answer. Help them by being specific in your request. Avoid diffuse descriptions and vague ideas. The precision of a request allows the person being asked to gauge whether they have the resources to be of assistance.

Make your preparations well beforehand. Write down the request and use it to practice the conversation. Anticipate the questions that will be asked and have at the ready direct and, very importantly, truthful answers.

Ask SMART

SMART is an acronym for the recommended way to make requests.

  • Specific – Direct and transparent requests receive the most favorable responses
  • Meaningful – Your request must be part of a broader objective with some gravitas
  • Action-based – The request must be for a specific action to be performed
  • Real – An honest, authentic request that you believe in and will follow through with
  • Time-bound – Open-ended requests remove the sense of urgency that instigates prompt action

Ask Far and Wide

We have all had experiences where we meet or connect with the exact person who is in the ideal position to help us at that moment. Such serendipities don’t have to occur on the whims of fate; we can orchestrate them by throwing out our feelers.

Clients and colleagues regularly share stories of how simply asking a question to their network elicited solutions from unexpected people and places. Sometimes, it is from halfway across the world; other times, it could be someone in the same building. Don’t deprive yourself of the opportunity.

Foster the Culture

Some organizations simply have cultures that are conducive to asking and receiving help. Yours can, too, with a little guidance. Set the right tone and lead by example. Start asking for help today by reaching out – and we will work together to keep up the momentum.